If you’re not feeling sexy and therefore avoiding sex with your man you are destroying your relationship.
I understand the lack of desire to have sex when you don’t feel good. I’m sure your partner does too. But if you’re avoiding sex for long periods of time because you don’t feel good ABOUT yourself then you’re causing your man to feel rejected. You need to make him feel desired.
It doesn’t matter to him if you’ve gained some weight since you first met or got married. It does matter that he still feels connected with you sexually.
When the sex works in a relationship, meaning it’s healthy, consensual, frequent, and fulfilling, then it only makes up 10 percent of the overall relationship. But when the sex doesn’t work, meaning there isn’t any, it’s not satisfying, or one partner wants more than the other, then it becomes 90 percent of the relationship.
Sex is the connection that bonds you together, or it’s the problem that can tear you apart.
It’s hard to feel loving and compassionate toward someone who isn’t meeting your needs. There’s a sense of disconnection when one or both partners feel frustrated. I have heard some women say that as soon as her man put a ring on her finger, she didn’t have to have sex anymore. Even if they don’t admit it, there are a lot of women who feel the same way. I feel that is manipulative. Sex is an important part of a healthy relationship. Without sex, you’re really just friends. The reason marriage gets a bad rap is lack of sex. Don’t let that happen to your relationship!
If you don’t genuinely enjoy sex or find yourself avoiding it, then perhaps you should seek out a sex therapist that can help you discover how wonderful it can be. Read Hot Monogamy (below) and answer the quizzes with your man. If you usually do enjoy sex, then even when you think you’re not in the mood, think again. Your thoughts create your feelings. Plan a romantic evening and think sexy thoughts to get you in the mood. Open your mind and allow your partner to turn you on; I promise you’ll enjoy it.
Touch each other frequently. Make each other feel wanted. Hold hands, hug your partner from behind, and even pat his butt. Simple affection keeps the sexual connection between you alive. An active sex life can keep a couple happy for decades. Plus it’s the fountain of youth! Great sex enjoyed on a regular basis can make you look seven to twelve years younger. It makes your immune system 33 percent stronger, decreases your risk of heart disease by up to 50 percent, and reduces insomnia and stress.
So if you’re feeling too stressed out to have sex, maybe what you really need is a little more foreplay to get you in the mood. Communication is a big part of great sex. Instead of saying no, tell him what you’d like him to do (even if he doesn’t ask). It will totally turn him on. Oh, and the “I have a headache” excuse really doesn’t fit either. Orgasms are a natural pain reliever. They can even relieve menstrual cramps.
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Get Hot Monogamy and answer the quizzes with your man.
