It is really easy to be impulsive, especially when emotions get high. We tend to react to something in the moment, based on what our instinct is telling us to do. However, I really want to encourage you to not act impulsively. Push the pause button, and just wait for a better part of your brain to kick in. That’s the whole point. There are different centers in your brain and the emotional response center is the first one to react, but it has no filter.
The more reasoning center of your brain takes a little bit more time to engage and pull in information so you cab make a rational decision. It’s much more qualified to make decisions about how you should respond to things. Daniel Goldman wrote a brilliant book called Emotional Intelligence. He very smartly put it, that the quick response center of your brain, is the low road.
The slower to kick in but more rational thinking part of your brain Goldman called the high road. But unfortunately, by the time the high road kicks in, it spends all of its time trying to make up for what the low road has already messed up. You find yourself regretting things or having to make amends for things to clean up the mess for your impulsive actions.
Thinking on your feet and responding immediately is not helpful to your relationship. I know many people are proud of having that ability to always have a quick comeback. I used to be one of them. But I now know that being impulsive is not smart. Our brain has many different centers that have different functions. The Amygdala is our emotional response center. That’s where our quick response to fear, anger, love, and sexual desire comes from. But it can’t make decisions. Our Prefrontal Cortex receives those emotions and helps us process them to make a decision.
Do yourself a favor when you’re feeling hot charged about something, and you have an impulse to do something. Wait.
Give your more rational brain a little bit more time to kick in. You can tell yourself, if I wait a little bit, a different part of my brain is going to kick in that is better equipped to think about this. You need to allow the time for that to happen so that you don’t mess up your relationships by acting impulsively and then really regretting it later. I’m Donna Barnes. Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share my videos if you found them helpful.
And if you need personalized help, I am available for private coaching.
