I’ve heard people say about online dating, “By the time you meet, it’s really just about whether you want to have sex or not.” I find a lot of truth in that. You’ve seen each other’s picture, exchanged e-mails, probably talked on the phone, and already know you have a lot in common. On paper, you seem to work, and you feel some sort of a connection. The last piece of the puzzle is whether there’s physical chemistry or not. How many times have you thought, “I hope she’s as good in person!”?
If the attraction is there when you finally do meet, it’s easy to feel comfortable with a virtual stranger. The pace of a relationship that begins on the Internet can become much accelerated. It can be wonderful, and it has resulted in marriage for a lot of couples. I just want you to keep in mind that you don’t know the other person yet. You need to take some time to verify that everything she said in her profile is true and that she’s as interested in you as you are in her.
Having met on the Internet adds a whole new dimension to beginning a relationship. You’re essentially competing with all the other men or women on the website. You probably had conversations or e-mails, and maybe even dates, going with more than one person, so you’d better believe your date did too. Just because you met doesn’t mean your meal has stopped communicating with all the others. They possibly still have other dates lined up. Internet dating opens you up to many potential partners. You both can and should be very picky if you decide to date online. That’s why it’s even more important not to have sex right away.
Ladies, you have to stroke his ego and make him want to wait for you. Let him show off a little and let him impress you. Gentleman, you have to make her or him feel cherished and respected. Most people need to feel needed. They need lots of acknowledgment that you like them. While you’re not giving them sex, you need to give them everything else that they need. Make sure you tell them how much you enjoy their company. Never criticize them. Be affectionate (but not a tease) and ask them to be patient with you. Know without a doubt that you are worth waiting for! Then they’ll know it, too.
Your choices about sex have a profound effect on your self-esteem and your relationships. Sex can be wonderful, empowering, and healthy. Sex can be considered making love. Sex can also be destructive, unhealthy, and obsessive. It can keep you addicted to an unhealthy situation. And if you confuse all sex for love, you most certainly won’t be feeling comforted.